Body Language Essay, Research Paper

It’s not what you say, it’s how you say. Parents have a lot on their mind, and sometimes, it’s tough to slow down

and focus on how they’re communicating. The style you use when speaking is as important as the words you

choose. If you speak hurriedly, your listener will most likely come away with an impression that you were

preoccupied or in a hurry, regardless of what you said. Most people are unconscious of their body language, but it

speaks volumes about what they’re really thinking. Watching your body language as well as that of your child can

help you learn to modify what you say so that your child hears you. Some things to watch for (in your kids and in

yourself):

Body posture. When you speak, are you slouching or turned away from your child? Do you point a finger

or shake a fist?

Facial expression. Are your eyebrows furrowed or raised? Are you smiling, squinting, or crying? Is your

jaw set?

Your voice. Is your tone sarcastic, sneering, or accusatory? Are you whining or shouting?

Your words. Do you command instead of communicate, tell instead of suggest? Are your words

ambiguous, biting, or accusatory?

Your mood. Are you tired, preoccupied, frustrated or irritable? Are you focused on the situation at hand?

If you recognize some of these tendencies in yourself, make a concerted effort to change your manner because

they only hinder communication. If you aren’t sure what your body language says while you’re speaking, try to be

more aware and take control of yourself the next time you speak with your child. When your body language

echoes the sentiments you’re expressing, you make it easier for your child to understand you.

I think that in terms of body language, nobody beats the Italians in sheer number of

gestures. I have a book with at least 50 different ones, and that doesn’t include the

obscene category. But Brazilians are not very far behind (try watching Brazilian TV

news…they can’t talk in Brazil without using their hands!). Our gallery of permitted body

language and gestures to avoid has grown over the past year, so we now have a

number of different pages.

By the way, I just had an experience in Rio which made me realize how important this

page really is. I shared a taxi with a Canadian who was there on business. He was a bit

leery of taking taxis because he had seen a taxi driver doing a gesture which he couldn’t

understand and thought might mean something bad…well, it turned out that the driver

had been making the gesture for “full.” Check out the pages listed below and be a savvy

traveler…

http://www.maria-brazil.org/gestures.htm

Japanese place great worth on nonverbal language. Verbal skills show superficiality to most Japanese in contrast to the inner,

less articulate feelings communicated through body language or by innuendo. One is often expected to sense another person’s

feelings on a subject without verbal communication. A person’s views unfold as he/she sees how others react; much is

suggested by indirectness and vague implication. What appears ambiguous on the surface is really not— the Japanese merely

place more importance on action than the spoken word. Part of this emphasis on body language is due to the importance and

pride of being part of a group in Japanese society. This pervading group consciousness makes the Japanese avoid open

confrontations in order to promote harmony among people in the group. Conformity in behavior within the context of the group

and in appearance is also characteristic of the Japanese.

Specific body language etiquette:

It is impolite to yawn. This is offensive to Japanese hosts.

Sit straight in chairs with your feet on the floor. The bottom of your feet should not be displayed.

Cross your legs only at the knees and ankles. Resting your foot on the opposite leg’s knee is considered impolite

because the bottom of your foot is considered unclean and offensive.

Beckoning is done by waving your entire hand.

It is acceptable to point with your entire hand at anything.

Cover your mouth when picking your teeth. It is considered an unhealthy, polluting activity around other people

especially while eating a meal.

Do not display your teeth.

Chewing gum is impolite.

The Japanese tend to avoid directly saying “No” in order to promote harmony with other people. The Japanese have an

aversion to open displays of feelings except drunkenness and sentimentality.

The Japanese smile in embarrassment, sorrow, and joy because of their desire to hide emotion.

Laughter does not always mean amusement. Laughter may be a sign of embarrassment or uncomfortableness depending

on the context. It is typical to avoid direct signs of emotion.

Behaving in conformity with the crowd is very important. This promotes understanding between people and unity—key

Japanese values.

Businessmen wear suits and ties. Proper dress is necessary for different occasions.

When visiting someone for dinner, the hierarchy of relations between the people eating determines the order and position

of the seating arrangement. This displays your identity and place within the group.

Bowing and its various depths and duration depends on the relative status and the relationship of the participants. A deep

bow in greeting is a sign of humility and should be exchange

http://kizuna.ins.cwru.edu/asia110/projects/Edo/body.html

Knowing how to read body language is a useful communication skill. So is knowing how to use it.

There are two basic groups of body language postures: OPEN/CLOSED and FORWARD/BACK

OPEN/CLOSED is the most obvious. People with arms folded and legs crossed and bodies turned away

are signalling that they are rejecting messages. People showing open hands, fully facing you and both feet

planted on the ground are accepting them.

FORWARD/BACK indicates whether people are actively or passively reacting to communication. When they are leaning

forward and pointing towards you they are actively accepting or rejecting the message. When they are leaning back, looking

up at the ceiling, doodling on a pad, cleaning their glasses they are either passively absorbing or ignoring it.

The posture groups combine to create four basic modes: responsive, reflective,

combative and fugitive.

In responsive mode, OPEN/FORWARD the person is actively accepting. This is

the time to close the sale, ask for agreement, demand a concession

In reflective mode, OPEN/BACK, people are interested and receptive but not actively accepting. Trying to close the sale

or asking for agreement now may drive them away into fugitive mode. This is the time to present further facts and incentives.

It may also be a good time to keep quiet and let them think.

In fugitive mode, CLOSED/BACK, people are trying to escape physically through the door or mentally into boredom. This

is the time to spark interest in any way you can, even irrelevant to the message.

Finally, in combative mode, CLOSED/FORWARD, there is active resistance. This is the time to defuse anger, avoid

contradiction and outright argument and to steer them into reflective mode.

How these modes are expressed in posture and gestures varies from culture to culture. For some of the more common North

American and European conventions of body language click