Santa Claus: Hero Or Hellspawn? Essay, Research Paper

Seilgrank ([email protected])

Am. Lit.

Persuasion Paper

12-11-97

Everyone knows the legend of Santa Claus, right? A jolly little fat man in a red

and white suit gathers up a bag full of toys and loads them into his sleigh where he and

his eight magical reindeer fly off into the night and deliver the toys to the children of the

world on Christmas eve, then fly back to Santa?s workshop at the North Pole where his

elves help him prepare again for next year all before the rising of the sun. Sounds like a

great thing, huh? A harmless tale told time and time again of a man who does nothing but

bring joy to the world, right? Wrong! Santa Claus may seem to be the ideal spirit of

Christmas but he is in fact the very embodiment of all that is unholy. He is a wolf in

sheep?s clothing who has been sent from the fiery pits of hell to devour our souls! Doubt

me, do you? Yes, I see you do. I don?t blame you. After all, the legend of Santa Claus as

a loving, caring individual has been around for hundreds of years, passed down from

generation to generation for as long as any one of us can remember. But unfortunately,

this tradition of passing the tale down from parent to child has merely been a vessel for

the seed of evil to pass in; to hide amongst us as a Trojan horse in the guise of a jolly fat

man! You see, we have been but blind sheep, lead by our parents who were lead by

theirs, into believing that he is good! But he is not! I see you need proof. Very well, then

it is proof I shall give you!

Santa Claus does not, as one might believe, help promote the celebrating of the

birth of Christ. No, in fact he does quite the opposite. Santa commercializes Christmas by

giving away presents. He makes us greedy. We come to expect the presents, and soon

that is all we think about. When Christmas time comes near, do you think of what prayer

you will recite, or do you think of what gift you want? Do you spend some time with your

family, each of you quietly celebrating the birth of Christ, or do you noisily rip into the

presents under the tree? Most of you would probably answer in favor of the latter. And

why? Because of Santa Claus. But this is not my only evidence of Kriss Kringle?s crimes

against Christmas! No! It is but the tip of the iceberg. Santa also tries to destroy this

beloved holiday by not giving us presents. Haven?t you ever written to Santa, asking for

that one special gift, but come Christmas morning it is nowhere to be found? This is

because he waits until we are hooked; he gives us gifts until we come to expect them as a

right, then he dashes our hopes by not giving us what we really want. You see, when we

do not get that one special gift it causes such sorrow and hatred that we begin to despise

Christmas. We hate the day that reminds us of our disappointment. And so we stop

celebrating Christmas altogether. And when he does give us our gifts, does he do it for

nothing? No! We are forced to pay him a tribute of milk and cookies or suffer having a

Christmas with a disappointed family!

Not only do Santa?s actions show him as being one of evil, but his very

appearance and origins do as well. His name, ?Santa Claus?, when you rearrange a few

letters, spells Satan Claus, or the claws of Satan! His very name shows him to be the

Devil?s right hand man! And the suit that Santa wears also betrays him as being a servant

of the unholy one; all red like the fires of hell with white trimming where you would find

the bone white horns of a demon. Early on, Santa was called Saint Nicholas, and from

the 5th to 15th centuries he was regarded as the patron saint of thieves! What else could

you expect from a man who breaks into houses in the middle of the night? He was said to

ride through the sky on a horse, much like one of the fabled Four Horsemen of the

Apocalypse. He impersonated people of the cloth by traveling the country in bishop?s

robes, and often was seen in the companionship of an elf known as Black Peter, who

would whip naughty children. Perhaps you are thinking, ?Well, he couldn?t have been all

that bad, if he was known as Saint Nicholas, right?? Wrong again. The name Nicholas, or

Nick, means to cut, meaning Saint Nicholas was cut from saintdom! How about Santa?s

other alias, Kriss Kringle. A Kriss is a sword with a wavy, double edged blade, meaning

that while Santa pretends to be a tool that you can use to fight the devil, he will actually

cut you on the backswing.

And how about Santa?s so-called helpers, the elves? Small, pointy eared men who

can build things unnaturally fast? Sound like demons in disguise to me. Or what of the

flying reindeer? Santa?s familiars? Just look at their names: Dasher, meaning to be

damned. Dancer, meaning to engage in or perform. Engage in or perform what? Acts of

evil, no doubt. Donder, which means to assume or take on a role, like acting to be a

friend when he is really your darkest enemy. Cupid, a false Roman god represented by a

nude child armed with a bow and arrows. Blitzen, a swift, sudden air attack. Prancer, to

walk about or strut in a proud manner, and pride is one of the most deadly of sins. Vixen,

a quarrelsome, shrewish, and malicious woman. And Comet, a celestial body, like that

which is used in such witchcrafts as Astrology.

I think that all of this should be enough to prove to even the most stubborn of

disbeliveers that Santa is in fact a real threat, and should be removed from our society

and revealed to be the real danger that he is before he can be allowed to sink his talons

further into the souls of our children.

(Note by the Author: This paper was written for a Creative Writing assignment, the purpose of which was to convince the audience of your point of view through persuasion. If you research all of the facts in this paper, you will notice that many are twisted or lies with a little truth thrown in, as it is with many speeches or writing that try to convince someone of something. My point of the writing was this: Don’t always believe something just because it was written on paper. Thanks – Seilgrank)