Beowulf Introspective Essay, Research Paper

Today is like any another dreary day. My name is the lonesome expression of anxiety, Carsinigensian. So alone in my abyss of despair, prayer is the only escape from this pain. Across the many rolling hills lay the decadence that is Thebes. The city is baron; it is but a wasteland of poverty and angst. Many years have past since the day the great ?king? was brought to his knees by the very city he had salvaged. It was the very day of my birth that the deeds of the tyrant Oedipus were revealed.

It was on the day of my manhood, my 18th birthday, that I traveled to a soothsayer at Delphi. This mystic being was one of many years; the clothes on his back were tattered and torn. From his face hang massive jowls, as does a dog?s. As I came into his presence, a look of sheer terror overcame his face. This soothsayer began to prophesize a fortune of unbelievable tales. I was told that was the new messiah. This news came as a supreme revelation. The second half of the prophecy was told as so:

??And ye shall carry forth the vengeance of God upon the heathens. God?s voice shall be heard as a blasting refrain from the song of life, treating all those who choose not to believe. Finally to recreate the beauty of life within the new land.?

This prophetic vision of the future was too much for any one man to comprehend. The extent of power that was foretold to me was overwhelming for boy just turned man.

I grasped the soothsayer by the neck of his cloak, at which point I held but a cloak. The soothsayer had vanished into thin air. I stood in awe at everything that had just transpired. This, the day of my manhood, had been turned into a horrific vision right before my eyes.

This brings my epic to present day. I have hired a coachman and chariot to take me to Mt. Cithearon, in the hope that time with my thoughts will clear the evils in my head. I have decided to bring my journal on this expedition to record some of the thoughts I mentioned. This journey will take over 2 months and will cross the path into Thebes. The coachman assures me the trip will be ?a harmless journey through the lands?.

The first month of the expedition has gone by so smoothly it is regrettable. I do not have a lust for adventure, however a trip as uneventful as this could cause a man to go mad. Once again I begin to slowly slip into this ?madness?. Along this endeavor the repetitive days begin to make the hired men loose their patience. One-man viciously sliced into the throat of another man while he slept. The murderer swore ?a voice from the heavens? instructed him to carryout this act. We had the murderer drawn and quartered.

The caravan came upon a small trade village, about 2-days ride from Thebes. The members of our party had a feast fit for a king. The local barkeep & serving maids prepared food from the far ends of the trade world. Turkey, venison, bison, pheasant, and cow meat were being presented to us on metal-cast dinner wear. Various side servings were available and too many to list. The men and I indulged ourselves on the banquet before us.

The next day has now dawned, the sun has arisen and the rooster crows. The men are well rested and ready to pass through Thebes. A feeling of restlessness has passed through my mind in this early hour of the day. We mount on the horses and begin our trek.

We are now entering the village of Thebes; the feeling of restlessness is still brewing within me. We are greeted by a man named ____N_____. I ask to see their resident clairvoyant. When a boy leads in this man, I stand in amazement. Not only is their soothsayer a cripple, he is blind to the world. Without external sight this man sees with internal eyes. I ask him of the prophecy I received earlier. His response is but a slur of words that resemble:

??The end of acceptance has arrived. Revel in horror; the end-all has arrived. It is the extension of God?s hand, sent to cleanse the soul of Thebes?

I regarded this expulsion of words as but the ramblings of a senile elder. As I had just reminded myself of my being, the actual hands of God graced me. The sky opened up as if sliced by a sword. Light brighter than any lantern or fire shown down upon me from the gash. A booming voice recited these words:

??My son, the time has come. You have been blessed with the power to cleanse the world of its evils. You must be the connection between the sheep and I. You are the herdsman of the people.?

I drew my sword and, with the vengeance of a thousand wrongs, began to ?cleanse? the people of Thebes. They try to run from the ever-watching eye of God, yet they only repent their sins at the point of a blade. My cold blade tore into the warm flesh of the heathens. They know salvation is only a prayer away; they take the chance of the fight. I am blessed by the almighty forgiveness; with this in mind I carve limbs in a bloody frenzy. This gore continues for what seems like only minutes, but is actually hours and hours.

In the wake of this God-given terror grows, rapidly, a small flower from the largest pool of blood. In minutes fields of beautiful flowers and ferns replace the sea of carnage. Once more the sky opens and a voice from above says; ?Good work my son. Now come home?. With that said I pierce into my stomach with the blade that has ended so many other lives.

I go peacefully into this wicked night, by my own hand.